Why o why o why

So I'm working on a research paper--not. I can't even start. I don't know how to even start. Any way I think about it it's going to sound lame and forced. In other words, I can't do serious. I can't write w/ an intellectual tone. I'm dumb. I can't do this aaaaaaaaaa. I don't have the confidence. Plus I'm slow. I tend to need to think it over many times until I have grasped abit of what I'm trying to convey. Otherwise it's a POF and I'll just wallow in this sea of guilt and self-pity.